As men we take pride in our ability to get things done, especially when we can do it and we do not need help. We take pride in our abilities, and we should. We should strive to grow and strengthen our capacity so that we can do more. That drive we have is a wonderful thing but the isolation factor that we often like to throw into the mix is an issue. It does not matter how gifted you are, you were not designed to be isolated.
I find it remarkable in the opening pages of the Bible that God expresses that it is not good for man to be alone. God saying that ought to be enough for us to believe that it is true but considering the context this sentiment comes from makes it more compelling. At this point in creation, Adam has the animals, a whole lot of pets. These were not deemed adequate as companions for man. What we usually glaze over is the other member Adam had in his life, God. The good Lord looked at Adam, who was in relationship with Him, and determined that their relationship was not adequate for Adam. I have heard lots of people argue that themselves and God is a majority. While there is truth to that, you and God exclusively still is not the design.
We need others if we are going to do remarkable things. Consider successful business moguls. They may have done great things alone but when they wanted to really grow, they had to hire others to work with them. They could not do it alone. I am a big basketball fan, and I thought The Last Dance was one of the best documentaries put together. It was remarkable to me that Michael Jordan, with all his athleticism and ability on the court, was not able to be the champion he became until he was surrounded by other capable players, a coach, and not until he started trusting his team. Again, it does not matter how gifted you are, you can’t do this alone.
As a dad, value your wife. She is your partner in parenting. Together you will make a tremendous impact in your children’s lives. Even if you are happily married, and especially if you are not, you need a community of other dads around you. Dads who are in the same phase of fatherhood and dads who have been there and done that. Cling to that community. There will be moments where you might want to withdraw and isolate, and that is the worst move you can make.
We need other people in our lives to survive and thrive. Having God is great, and I highly recommend that, but God still wants you to have a community of others that you are a part of. You’ll find the strength, guidance, acceptance, and friendship that you need in community. Do not deprive yourself of these essential elements. Be in community.