As Christian dads, we often take pride in how we plan, schedule, and provide for our families. We divide our time into categories—discipline, instruction, activities, and spiritual growth. We structure our days around what our kids need.
But in doing that, we sometimes miss something vital.
Fun and connection aren’t separate from discipleship—they’re at the heart of it.
When you laugh with your kids, when you let your guard down, when you make space for shared joy, you’re not just playing a game. You’re building trust. You’re strengthening your relationship. You’re laying the foundation for influence.
And if you want to disciple your children—to teach them to follow Christ—you need relationship first.
Let me share two simple resources that have helped my family do just that.
Why Every Dad Needs to Blur the Lines
Most dads have a gift for compartmentalizing. We break life into categories:
- Fun time
- Teaching time
- Disciplinary time
- Spiritual time
- Family time
We keep these roles separate because it helps us function. But what if that separation is hurting more than helping?
Here’s what I’ve discovered: connection happens most naturally when we’re having fun.
And fun isn’t wasted time—it’s the soil where trust and relationship grow.
So today, I want to encourage you: blur the lines a little.
Let “fun” and “discipleship” overlap. Let “laughing” and “learning” walk hand in hand. Use joy as a tool to build the kind of relationship that gives you influence in your child’s life.
Two Tools That Changed the Atmosphere in My Home
I’m going to introduce you to two resources that have radically improved connection and joy in our house:
- Cards Against Humanity: Family Edition
- Questions for Humans: Parents & Kids Edition by Dr. John Delony
These aren’t Bible studies or devotionals.
But they’re effective tools for building the kind of relationships that make spiritual conversations possible.
Let’s talk about each one.
Resource #1: Cards Against Humanity—Family Edition
Yes, you read that right. And no, I’m not suggesting the adult version.
The Family Edition is crafted specifically for kids and families. Even the box says: “For mature kids and immature adults.” Perfect.
If you’ve ever played Apples to Apples, this will feel familiar—only funnier.
Why It Works
- It’s hysterical. My eight-year-old laughs so hard, he can’t get through reading his cards.
- It levels the playing field. Adults and kids play by the same rules.
- It creates memories and develops inside jokes. Favorite cards become family slogans. (“The sweet honking of Karen’s bassoon,” anyone?)
- It opens the door to joy. Shared laughter builds emotional connection.
But What About Inappropriate Content?
Good question. We did pull a few cards out of the deck:
- Cards with language or concepts our family wasn’t ready for
- Cards that referenced things like alcohol, profanity, or adult humor
But we still had an overwhelming majority of cards left—and a ton of fun.
What mattered more than the card content was this:
My kids saw that mom and dad could be silly, goofy, and full of laughter.
What Fun Communicates to Your Kids
- Dad likes to have fun.
- Dad doesn’t always take life so seriously.
- I can come to Dad with jokes or silliness.
- Dad wants to spend time with me.
And that last one? That’s big. Because when your kids believe you want to be with them, they’re more likely to come to you with what really matters.
Laughter is connection. And connection builds trust.
Resource #2: Questions for Humans: Parents and Kids Edition
This one’s about conversation. Not every dad is great at starting meaningful dialogue, and that’s okay. That’s where this deck comes in.
Created by Dr. John Delony (Check out my episode with him), this deck is a simple tool:
A stack of question cards designed to help you connect with your kids.
Here are a couple of examples:
- What’s a food you’ve always wanted to try?
- Where are you when you feel most calm? What helps you feel calm?
Why It Works
- It opens the floor to conversation. Your kids get a chance to speak.
- It creates insight. You learn how your kids think and feel.
- It normalizes dialogue. Your children get used to talking with you about more than chores and rules.
- It becomes a tradition. We used them during dinner, and before long, our kids were the ones asking, “Where are the question cards?”
How to Use It Effectively
- Keep it casual. Don’t make it a formal event.
- Let the kids go first—unless they need your example.
- Don’t push for deep answers. Let them respond however they want.
- Use it consistently. Even 1–2 questions a night adds up over time.
The beauty of these cards is that they create space—space for curiosity, laughter, thoughtfulness, and connection.
Why These Two Tools Matter So Much
Here’s the reality: your ability to disciple your children is tied directly to your relationship with them.
No relationship = no influence.
No influence = no discipleship.
You cannot lead a child who doesn’t feel connected to you.
And while Bible study is vital, and discipline has its place, relationship is the foundation. These tools help you build that foundation through:
- Shared joy
- Honest conversation
- Regular connection
A Word to the Serious or Stoic Dad
Maybe humor doesn’t come naturally to you.
Maybe you’re more reserved, more structured, or more serious.
That’s okay.
But I encourage you: stretch yourself.
Let loose—even if it feels weird at first. Let your kids see you smile, laugh, and be silly. They won’t forget it.
Even if your jokes flop or your humor’s dry, your effort is what matters.
Your kids will remember that you tried. That you valued joy. That you wanted to be close to them.
And that will matter for the rest of their lives.
What Happens When You Create a Culture of Fun and Connection?
- Your kids open up more.
- Your kids trust you more.
- Your kids WANT to be around you.
- Your home feels lighter and happier.
- You’re more approachable for the serious conversations that really count.
And long-term?
You’ve built a foundation of relationship that can support the weight of guidance, wisdom, and spiritual leadership.
Want to Go Deeper? Here’s a Free Gift.
If you’re a new dad—or you’re ready to start fresh—I’ve written a short, practical book called “Cut the Crap: Direct Tips for Becoming a Dad.”
I don’t teach diaper changes or bottle prep, but I do give you five key areas every dad needs to focus on.
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If it helps you, feel free to support the mission. But honestly, I just want to help.
Final Word: Don’t Underestimate Joy
Let your home be the place where laughter echoes and connection thrives.
Let it be a place where jokes are told, questions are asked, and memories are made.
Let your kids grow up thinking:
- “Dad is fun.”
- “Dad listens.”
- “Dad is safe.”
- “I love being around my dad.”
Because those are the kinds of thoughts that build hearts that are soft toward your leadership—and toward the heart of God.
So grab the games. Ask the questions. Tell the dumb jokes.
And be the dad who’s not afraid to laugh.
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